I wish I’d said I love you (so I’m saying it now)

Most of the time, when I think of what I wished I said in the heat of the moment, “I love you” tops the list.  It’s what’s most important in this life anyway, isn’t it?  None of the other stuff even comes close.   Even when I am not feeling particularly loving, the other person needs to hear it.  Of course, there is a time and a place for these words.  You don’t really want to go around telling strangers you love them.  But what if you did?  Just think of how much better this world would be if we all did that.  Everybody’s worthy of love, after all.

Nobody likes to feel pressured into doing anything.  And saying those three little words frighten people, especially if they are worried it won’t be reciprocated.  I think life is too short for fear, especially that fear.  We are loved completely at any given moment – by the One who created us –  but most of us don’t allow ourselves to feel it.  It’s really sad.  That is where meditation and prayer come in.  I have a short little prayer that I say in my head all the time – “Lord, have mercy.”  I have bad balance and fall down a lot, and when I do, that prayer goes through my soul like water.  Reading a particularly sad news article?  Lord, have mercy.  Waking up in the morning – Lord, have mercy.  And He will.  For my God is a merciful God.

I know this is a broken world – oh, boy, do I know that or what.  If it was perfect, it would be paradise, and there would be no disease, no terrorists, and no death.  All the bad things would not exist.  But the only way that would be possible was if God hadn’t put the Tree of Good and Evil in the garden with Adam and Eve.  Why did He, if He knew what was going to happen?  The temptation was too great, the serpent too cunning.  Didn’t He know that?

Of course He did.

I have no answers to the “Whys” of it.  But I do have the love of Christ in me, and because of that, I know that after this life is done, I’ll be going home.  I will not let regrets haunt me.  I will say “I love you” more.  And I will live up to my words.  I will.  This is my promise to myself and to the world.

 

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