At the well

Jesus had been traveling a long time, going back to Galilee.  To get there, he had to pass through Samaria.  Exhausted, he stopped in Sychar, a Samaritan village that bordered the land Jacob had given his son Joseph.  Jesus came to Jacob’s well around noon, and sat down to rest.  While he was there, a Samaritan woman came to draw water.  Jesus politely asked her for a drink.

She wanted to know why he, a Jew, was asking her for a drink.  He then said, “If you knew who I was, you would ask me for a drink, and I would give you living water.”

Of course, she thought that Jesus was talking about literal water.  She said, “Sir, you don’t have a bucket, and the well is deep.  How can you possibly give me water?”  (The book of John, chapter 4)

When we are facing the next big thing in our lives, we are all for the change it will bring – we feel it in our hearts and souls that we are on the correct path.  If we just continue to go straight…

I know I am on the right path now, with childhood cancer awareness and writing.  There are certainly times when I think it’s too much for me to handle, but then I stop and remind myself that I am not in this alone.  God is with me.  I think of the things I don’t have or that I can’t do – of all the obstacles in my path, until they become bigger than God in my view.  I talk myself out of God’s best.

“Nobody is listening.  They want me to shut up about childhood cancer.  They don’t want to think about it.  It’s too awful.”  Well, guess what?  I am not going to shut up about it.  I am a survivor of neuroblastoma.  If anything or anyone is rare, then I am – for having survived this cancer.  For the longest time, I questioned God.  Growing up, I would have given anything if I had just woken up one day to find that how I usually dream of myself (strong, healthy, whole) had been transferred into reality.  Trust me on that.  But I think that would have been too easy for God to do – he wanted me to thrive just the way I was.  I didn’t thrive for the longest time because I didn’t understand why things were the way they were.  I questioned everything, and rejected most things.  But now, I get it somewhat.  And I can’t even begin to guess where I’ll be in ten or twenty years.  It’s in God’s hands.

“I don’t feel like writing today.”  Well, guess what?  When that happens, I just have to sit in front of my laptop staring at a blank screen.  I cannot do anything else – no Facebook, no games, no emails, no internet browsing, no reading, no tv, no music, no nothing.  I have to think about writing.  I have to daydream to get the juices flowing.  I have to start somewhere, right?

I’m not going to obsess over what I don’t have.  It isn’t helpful.  Instead, I’ll look up in faith.  I know my weaknesses.  So does God.  And together, we’ll find a way to overcome them.  If not, then we’ll find a way around them.  God is always strong, even when I’m at my weakest.  I have the key, and there’s a locked door in front of me with a sign on it that says POTENTIAL.  I am going to reach out and unlock it.

And the living water?  I’m taking it with me.  Always.

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